Coldness

I wanted to be a warm heart , but it has slowly turned to ice .And I wonder how long can it keep going , how long I would stand with that heaviness ..

I see my breath turning to panting , my skin not keeping me warm enough .I have started to doubt myself after seeing hatred in everyone’s eyes …

Once I appreciated their laughs now I hate them smiling , as if it’s fake like out of mercy throwing upon me , as if to mock me ..

And I wish for summer , to come penetrate through my skin and help me look clearer at the picture standing Infront of the mirror …

I don’t know how I look , this layer of ice has impaired my vision and I wish for a voice to come reach me ..

There is no sense in these frozen limbs , I walk like a ice block dragging itself on a rough surface …

It’s cold , my heart . I have started to like grey clouds and emptiness in my heart , like they are the only ones acknowledging my existence like they will never call me ugly , like they will embrace my half dead soul …

Yet , somewhere my heart asks for summer , beer bottles , endless conversations and nights full of laughter …

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